Sunday, October 31, 2010

Election Night Thriller (Yet another spoof song)

My first spoof song since the Shiitake Awards, I think. As heard on ARC Talk Radio on my birthday, Oct. 31, 2010 (yes I was really born on Halloween)!

ELECTION NIGHT THRILLER
(Sung to Michael Jackson's Thriller)

It's close to midnight/ And something evil's lurking on TV
Right now on primetime/ You see some crap you really can't believe
You Try to scream/ But you still can't drown out Ann Coulter's screeching
You start to freeze/ As Bill O'Reilly looks you in the eyes
Feeding you lies!

'Cause its a thriller, election night!
And no one's gonna save you from four more years of this tripe!
You know it's thriller, election night
Your fighting for your right to fight this killer, election night!

You change the channel/ But election cov'rage rules on every one
You feel a cold chill/ You're wondering who voted for this bum
You close your eyes/ And hope some people voted independent
But all the while/ You see another tally rolling in
You just can't win!

Cause it's a thriller, election night!
There ain't no chance he'll lose now with a lead that friggin' wide!
You know it's thriller, election night
You'll want to end your life here on this killer election night!

The votes are all tallied and evil ones cheer in their masquerade
There's no escape from the lies of the winners this time
Its the end of your life!

They're out to get you/ It feels there's nothing more that you can do
They'll raise your taxes/ but then again that's nothing new to you
Now is the time/ for us to move the heck out of this country
All through the night/ I'll push the car pedal to the floor
To reach the border!

'Cause its a thriller election night
And no one's gonna save you from the damn teabagger's strike
Yeah it's a thriller election night
So spread your cheeks real wide and take this-
-Killer, diller, chiller, thriller, election night!
It's a thriller election night
Those elephants and donkeys got you locked into their sights
Yes it's a thriller election night
So spread your cheeks real wide and take this killer, thriller, ow!

We're getting screwed tonight!

Darkness falls across the land
Election hour is close at hand
Creatures ponder for your votes
The night air fills with pundit's notes
And whosoever shall be found
An undecided voter still in town
Must stand and face the ballot from hell
And choose from two clowns he can't can't apart tell

The foulest stench is in the air
The funk of FOUR MORE YEARS!
And grisly laws from womb to tomb
Will be passed soon to seal your doom
And as you watch the nightly news
Your body starts to shiver
For no mere mortal can withstand
The evil election night thriller!

[Evil laugh]

1 comment:

  1. That is TOO funny! I'm sorry that I missed it last night. Thanks for sharing it. And Happy Birthday!

    ReplyDelete