Lunsford Take The Money and Run (Spoof Song)

VOTE NOW FOR THE 2010 SHIITAKE AWARDS: http://shiitakeawards.blogspot.com/

Voting for the 2010 Shiitake Awards is taking place, so I set the mood by sharing the lyrics for one of the spoof songs featured in the 2009 Shiitake Awards. CLICK HERE to visit the Shiitake Awards during the month of December to vote, to watch the 2009 awards show, or to find out more about the third annual Shiitake Awards if you're not familiar with the awards show. No surprise, Mark Lunsford was a double winner (or loser, depending on your perception).

Lunsford take the money and run

[Spoof of "Take the money and run" By: Steve Miller Band]

This here’s a story about Mark Lunsford’s money woes

Some people asked where his foundation money goes

Got a custom chopper and a hummer parked outside

People got suspicious he was taking them for a ride

The IRS wanted to search his castle

You know ol’ Lunsford didn’t want that hassle

Hank Asher came in to bail out this bum

So now he’ll take the money and run

Lunsford take the money and run

Lunsford take the money and run

Lunsford take the money and run

Lunsford take the money and run

HERE IS A SECOND SPOOF, DEDICATED TO THE 2009 EVERYDAY ZEROES WINNER, PAUL SANDMAN, WHO TRIED TO EXTORT MONEY FROM A REGISTRANT:

MISTER PAUL SANDMAN
[Spoof of "Mr Sandman" By The Cordettes]

Mister Sandman Extorted Me [bum bum bum bum]

He needed money to buy him some weed [bum bum bum bum]

He tried to cheat me out of my clover [bum bum bum bum]

But one call to the cops and now its over!

Mister Paul Sandman sits all alone [bum bum bum bum]

Inside that jail cell he calls his home [bum bum bum bum]

For all the things he stole from me

Paul Sandman extorted me!

Election Night Thriller (Yet another spoof song)

My first spoof song since the Shiitake Awards, I think. As heard on ARC Talk Radio on my birthday, Oct. 31, 2010 (yes I was really born on Halloween)!

ELECTION NIGHT THRILLER
(Sung to Michael Jackson's Thriller)

It's close to midnight/ And something evil's lurking on TV
Right now on primetime/ You see some crap you really can't believe
You Try to scream/ But you still can't drown out Ann Coulter's screeching
You start to freeze/ As Bill O'Reilly looks you in the eyes
Feeding you lies!

'Cause its a thriller, election night!
And no one's gonna save you from four more years of this tripe!
You know it's thriller, election night
Your fighting for your right to fight this killer, election night!

You change the channel/ But election cov'rage rules on every one
You feel a cold chill/ You're wondering who voted for this bum
You close your eyes/ And hope some people voted independent
But all the while/ You see another tally rolling in
You just can't win!

Cause it's a thriller, election night!
There ain't no chance he'll lose now with a lead that friggin' wide!
You know it's thriller, election night
You'll want to end your life here on this killer election night!

The votes are all tallied and evil ones cheer in their masquerade
There's no escape from the lies of the winners this time
Its the end of your life!

They're out to get you/ It feels there's nothing more that you can do
They'll raise your taxes/ but then again that's nothing new to you
Now is the time/ for us to move the heck out of this country
All through the night/ I'll push the car pedal to the floor
To reach the border!

'Cause its a thriller election night
And no one's gonna save you from the damn teabagger's strike
Yeah it's a thriller election night
So spread your cheeks real wide and take this-
-Killer, diller, chiller, thriller, election night!
It's a thriller election night
Those elephants and donkeys got you locked into their sights
Yes it's a thriller election night
So spread your cheeks real wide and take this killer, thriller, ow!

We're getting screwed tonight!

Darkness falls across the land
Election hour is close at hand
Creatures ponder for your votes
The night air fills with pundit's notes
And whosoever shall be found
An undecided voter still in town
Must stand and face the ballot from hell
And choose from two clowns he can't can't apart tell

The foulest stench is in the air
The funk of FOUR MORE YEARS!
And grisly laws from womb to tomb
Will be passed soon to seal your doom
And as you watch the nightly news
Your body starts to shiver
For no mere mortal can withstand
The evil election night thriller!

[Evil laugh]

"Recession Bells of Christmas" Spoof Lyrics

Here's the lyrics for my spoof song "Recession Bells of Christmas, which was featured on Mary ad Kevin's "American's Reality Check" show on 12/24/2009. You can click on the link to access the show's home page and archives!

www.talkshoe.com/talkshoe/web/talkCast.jsp?masterId=29521&cmd=tc

Recession Bells of Christmas [Sung to tune of “Carol of the Bells”]
Written by Derek W. Logue
12/22/2009

Money’s all spent, How could we let
Our government, Put us in debt?
Health care is broke, that ain’t no joke
Young and the old, out in the cold
Interest rates up, getting fed up
STILL in Iraq, why aren’t we back?
And those Chinese, jobs overseas
Cheap lead-filled toys, to girls and boys
O How they pound, raising their sound
Capitol Hill, lies to us still!

They bailed out banks, GM says thanks
What’s that about? Where’s MY bailout?!?
Do you have some change that you can spare?
Do you have some change that you can spare?

Black Friday Blues, Credit card dues
Bleeding us dry, I wanna cry!
All my stocks sank, Can’t fill my tank
Damn SUV, please help me!
401-K, all went away
Got my Pink Slip, Welfare’s a trip
Can’t make ends meet, Now I people greet
At a Wal-Mart, Hey it’s a start!
Recession’s away, that’s what they say
But I can’t tell, stuck in this hell
O How they pound, raising their sound
Capitol Hill, lies to us still!

Last dime was spent, Buying this tent
White-Collar dude, Will work for food
Do you have some change that you can spare?
Do you have some change that you can spare?

Debts of Today, Our grandkids pay
Put off today, that’s the American way!

"Anarchy in Miami" Spoof Lyrics

Here is the song I wrote for Mary and Kevin's "Americans Reality Check Radio" show for their 2009 Christmas Eve special on 12/24/2009. Click on the link to access the show's Talk Shoe page and archive. I'm sure Ron Book and Gov. Charlie Crist will LOVE this song! (I sang the song on the show, by the way)

www.talkshoe.com/talkshoe/web/talkCast.jsp?masterId=29521&cmd=tc

Anarchy in Miami [Sung to tune of “Anarchy in the UK” by the Sex Pistols]
Spoofed lyrics by Derek “The Fallen One” Logue

I am anti-Crist
Ron Book is such a crook
Can’t trust politicians and they just don’t get it
They wanna destroy human lives

And all I ever see, anarchy!
In Miami

Homeless camp at the JTC
National shame for the world to see
Ron Book and Crist hogging media time
Blaming each other for this crime

And all I ever see, anarchy!
In Miami

Using deception just to get what they want
Exploiting the law, knowing it’s flawed
Residency laws just don’t work
But they don’t care because they’re jerks

All I ever see, anarchy!
In Miami

Is this the USSR
Is this state ruled by a czar
Nothing worse than FLA
The dumbest state in the USA
This is a muffed up country
Another council hypocrisy

I don’t wanna see anarchy!
And its time to end anarchy!
Abolish residency laws!
And its time to end anarchy!
Residency laws destroy!

"The Troll Bash" Song Lyrics

Here is the song I wrote for Mary and Kevin's "Americans Reality Check Radio" show for Halloween 2009. Click on the link to access the show's Talk Shoe page and archive (Note: I did not sing the song, simply wrote it!)

www.talkshoe.com/talkshoe/web/talkCast.jsp?masterId=29521&cmd=tc

The Troll Bash [Sung to “Monster Mash” by Bobby “Boris” Pickett]

Spoofed lyrics by Derek “The Fallen One” Logue

I was working online late one night

When my eyes beheld an eerie sight

When the comment boards became filled with lies

By honestly I’m not surprised

[They did the bash] That site was troll bashed

[The TROLL bash] Everything they said was trash

[Their site was trashed] It made my computer crash

[They love to bash] They did the troll bash

From the West Coast News to the Daily East

The trolls came out for their nightly feast

While hiding within their slummy abodes

They sign in and start up in attack mode

[They did the bash] That site was troll bashed

[The TROLL bash] Everything they said was trash

[Their site was trashed] It made my computer crash

[They love to bash] They did the troll bash

The P-Jerks were having fun

The comments were really dumb

The pests included Stitches

Jacey and her son

They found all my posts like a pack of hounds

And the extent of their lies had no bounds

But as soon as our voice of truth had arrived

The trolls decided it was time to take five

[They did the bash] That site was troll bashed

[The TROLL bash] Everything they said was trash

[Their site was trashed] It made my computer crash

[They love to bash] They did the troll bash

Rob Taylor was spewing non-sensical things

Static and TSand tied to puppet strings

They opened their mouths and shook their fists

Every word they say they distort and twist

[They did the bash] That site was troll bashed

[The TROLL bash] Everything they said was trash

[Their site was trashed] It made my computer crash

[They love to bash] They did the troll bash

The trolls have all their heads stuck in the sand

Spreading their lies across the land

So spread the truth whatever you do

And when they complain tell them Mary and Kevin sent you

[Then you can bash] Then you can troll bash

[The TROLL bash] The truth beats all their trash

[The troll bash] They’ll be gone in a flash

[The troll bash] Then you can troll bash